Come share your ideas, inspirations, challenges and thoughts with other smart folks on The Healing Road.
In June of 2020 my husband and I decided to part ways. In July and August we were packing and selling our primary home, and also selling our mountain home, which I ran as a vacation rental business. Between losing the marriage, both homes and the business, I was beside myself. I felt overwhelmed and unsafe in a way I can only describe as primal.
Imagine a bunch of balloons. When their strings are tied to something heavy, all is well. They may sway in the breeze, but they remain in place. However, cut their strings and they go flying off in every direction at the whim of the wind, drifting farther and farther apart as they rise.
I felt like that bunch of balloons. Nothing in my life felt anchored. It was all up in the air, all at the same time, and just as a bunch of untethered balloons splits apart, I felt I was splitting apart too. I felt fearful and untethered, as if I might fly off the earth and out into space like a balloon. All I wanted was for something to feel stable and solid.
Fast forward to November.
The Atlanta house was sold. The mountain house was sold. We met with an attorney to start divorce paperwork. I had grieved the loss of both homes -- homes I loved dearly -- plus the vacation rental business I had run for twelve years. I grieved (and am still processing) the loss of my 24 year relationship.
In this process, I noticed two things...
1. Allowing myself to feel those losses deeply and grieve them enabled me to let them go.
2. The letting go enabled me to shift my perspective and see the gifts among the loss.
Once the pain of the losses had passed through me, I shifted my perspective.
When I realized I no longer had to carry the burden of home ownership or running that business, it was like a ray of sunshine entered my thoughts. I don't have to live with the constant low hum of worry that I'd accidentally double-booked mountain house? No more laying in bed thinking, "Do I hear a water drip?" No more spending Saturdays in the mountains pulling weeds, laying mulch, trimming bushes and planting new deck planters? No more pressure washing the driveway? No more donning heavy duty gloves to clean out the trash can because guests couldn't follow simple instructions? No more submitting monthly rental taxes? No more chipmunk eradication projects that never seem to work anyway? No more fixing appliances by watching YouTube videos? Double pane window seals broken and foggy? No longer my problem! Deck boards cracking? No longer my problem!
I was FREE!
As these revelations became clear, I realized nothing was holding me in Atlanta. With no reason to stay in Atlanta and desperately wanting to reconnect with friends and family, I came up with a plan to work remotely and travel and that's when the Fit and Fearless Road Tour was born.
How does the feeling of being UNTETHERED go from being terrifying to being exciting?
Perspective! The ability to see the same situation in two entirely different ways is truly a gift.
How has the gift of perspective shown up in your life?
I pride myself on being authentic on social media. Nothing in my social channels is fake or polished. However, being authentic doesn't mean I've shared everything publicly.
Those who know me well, know I tend to not talk about my challenges, because I strive to be a positive person. I'm just not a complainer. Buuuuut... it's going to be obvious that things have changed, so it's time for me to fill you in.
Whatever challenges you faced in 2020, and continue to face, I acknowledge and honor. In no way do I think my problems are the worst imaginable ... we all have our own unique set of circumstances and challenges, and all are valid. ❤
In looking at my own 2020 Cosmic Tally Board, I'm down one marriage, two houses, one business and a car.
HOWEVER, I'm also UP one Honda minivan and I'm taking that bad boy on the road for the next 12 to 18 months. I'm on The Healing Road, and that's why I built this community.
I believe we're all on a journey of growth and healing, so I created this community to ...
Things I’ve done for the first time this year
Stacking wins... hell yeah.
Went on the road and lived nomadically
Fell in love with pickle ball
Tried Zumba for the first time (I didn’t like it but I was proud of myself for trying it)
Ate grilled oysters and raw oysters
Fell in love with baked squash
Bought a road bike and began cycling with those scary clip-in shoes
Threw knives and stars this year
Started a monthly self-mastery zoom call
Recorded my first masterclass on building habits
Ran my first Clubhouse room
Joined a 10 month structured coaching program
I'm now keeping a separate journal for anything else that I try for the first time.
Branch out. Try things. Take a chance. What's the worst that can happen and what's the BEST that can happen?
My whole life I never liked squash or sweet potatoes.. Imagine my surprise when I discovered recently that I really do like them! I've added kabocha squash, acorn squash and butternut squash to my shopping lists and I couldn't be happier
I'm not sure if it's the change in my diet the last few years or simply the fact that as we get older our palate changes but I am absolutely delighted! The great news about squash is they are a fraction of the calories and carbohydrates of sweet potatoes so you can have them on a low carb way of eating! Especially if you have them plain with just salt and pepper.
Here's to branching out in all the ways!
